maintenance crew

We can all agree that the maintenance crew at any location- especially a zoo- is invaluable! I tip my hat to people who can go in day after day and clean up someone Else's mess. As any mother knows, maintenance is one of our many jobs and we, too, are often busy cleaning up after others. There are a few differences however:

1. I don't get paid. My zoo's version of a tip is bringing me the broom and informing me that I missed a spot. Likewise, my bonus consists of new cleaners, machines and rubber gloves.

2. I don't have too many options in moving up in management. I can teach my crew but nonetheless, I am still working day and night shifts.

3. I can't quit, retire or take a sick day. Well, I can but nobody likes used underwear so strike or not; work still has to get done.

There are benefits to my job though. I am my own master, I can usually make my own schedule and although they keep coming back, I can fire anyone I choose. I also have my own parking spot!

Needless to say, cleaning this zoo is job security- I will never run out of things to do in this house! Most days I'm fishing crackers out of the couch, finding Legos with my bare feet, cleaning up toothpaste off the door knobs, separating ketchup from the walls, ceilings, table, floors and children or doing some everyday chores like washing the entire wardrobe a certain boy and girl who insist on mixing dirty with clean. I used to try and separate the two by smelling clean vs. dirty... yeah, bad idea- just throw the whole pile in the wash!

We all have our own special styles and techniques when it comes to cleaning up. Mr. Zookeeper uses gloves, lots of soap and a broom- everything gets swept into a pile, put into baskets and left for the cleaning fairy to put away (at least he gets it off the floor for me!). Certain disasters find him grateful for his day job and I get a smile, kiss and "good luck with that!" Really though, I am very fortunate to have a husband that helps around the house. Everyone likes a little eye candy, even when our job is wearing our grubbies and scraping the toilets with a toothbrush. Rhino works for dollars. You should not pay kids to clean up their own messes or help out, but he shares a room with Tiger and well, that's just not fair to anyone. Tiger pleads incompetent. He can do anything he sets his mind to until it's time to clean, then everything is broken and he needs a rest. Puppy inherited her grandma's gene and likes a clean house; give her an apron and a rag and she's good to go. Monkey? She loves to have everything out where she can see it and asking her to clean up requires a great deal of princess make believe. Where is Maintenance Barbie I'd like to know? I detest dog hair but he earns his keep every time another bowl of mac and cheese hits the floor and I'd rather apologize to a guest for a little fur on their pants than a serving of noodle on their sock! You know those houses that have signs insisting you leave your shoes at the front door? Yeah, ours screams for you to leave them on... and wear a hard hat or any other protective gear if at all possible.

I personally like things tidy but these are also zoo-grounds so it's a never ending construction zone. I do not mind cleaning and enjoy the result but I am not a long suffering clean up crew. I want the job to be as efficient as possible. I admit it, if an item is too offensive to clean, I throw it away. Which is probably why I can never find any bowls. I love vacuuming because that usually means break time is soon. Every shift goes smoother with the radio playing louder than the ambiance and the mop that doubles as a microphone always lets me lead. Sometimes, when I'm really depressed about cleaning (like when it's a huge mess or it's only been a day since I was last called to the exact same cleanup on aisle 5) I'll turn on a motivating and uplifting talk. I find the ones that talk about how precious children are usually saves lives.

We all have our chores and while my list probably looks different than others (unless you too have ketchup lovers/napkin haters), we all find ways to tackle our nemesis'. So, what secrets do you all have up your sleeves? How do you whip your home into shape, or keep it's perfect shape? What motivates you and what days are you available...